im doing this play in which i play a person who like to keep distant from drug abusers and dealers in life no matter how close they are to me.
soo i wanted your help in coming up with a rather funny, interesting but at the same time believable list of” top 10 reasons why I avoid drug abusers"
thanx in advance
My top 10 reasons to avoid drug abusers:
1. I don’t like walking around with my hand on my wallet. It looks like self-abuse and the ladies look at me kinda funny.
2. At parties, they’re likely to dive under the table when my girlfriend is helping herself to the punch; they may not actually be looking up her skirt but I’d rather not take the risk.
3. I just hate the whole rigmarole of having to report my stolen mobile to the police, then conveying the complaint docket number to the cellphone company to get the number blocked, then applying in triplicate to have the number assigned to a new SIM card… and having to pay for all this, plus the new instrument. It’s just too much.
4. They see things I can’t. I’d rather that we all saw the same things. It’s hard to battle Mediaeval Knights when one can’t see them, especially when all one wants to do is sleep because it’s frickin’ 2 a.m.!
5. They keep saying, "Man" and I don’t like to be reminded that I’m over 40.
6. Women are attracted to them because they are wild and dangerous. At least, all my girlfriends who went with them told me that. Maybe I’ll invest in some pills… the blue kind…
7. They get more sympathy than I do.
8. They’d probably be able to think up 8th, 9th and 10th reasons, while I have to rely on logic.
9. Every woman I know wants to change them, which makes them blinking chick magnets! I’m already husband material, so no one is interested.
10. They don’t answer. Not even at Yahoo! Answer. That makes them mysterious. Guess what that does to the women???